DEJA VU ALL OVER AGAIN

It has been almost 40 years since the first major energy crisis of our time.  Ironically, this is the same period it took wandering in the desert to find the "Promised Land."   Over these past 40 years, have we reached the "promised land" of energy self-sufficiency to avoid jarring shock waves to our economy?  You do not need a crystal ball to predict events of the this Spring and Summer as unrest spreads in the Middle East.

The unrest in Libya will continue into the Spring.  Eventually, the oil fields will be shut down either by the anti-government forces or by Qaddafi himself in his final act of defiance. The shutdown of the Libyan wells will result in the price of oil jumping to $150 a barrel and gasoline prices approaching $4.00 a gallon.  Congress  will pass a new law that limits highway speed to 55 mph to conserve the fuel in our tanks.  Expect the President to announce the formation of a bi-partisan panel to examine ways to reach 100% energy independence by the year 2080.  The Republicans will announce that they will refuse to participate.

By late Spring and early Summer the unrest that is traveling through the Middle should hit to Saudi Arabia and Iran.  As the people take to the streets in these countries, the price of oil should leap to $200 a barrel  and gasoline will approach $5.00 a gallon.  Expect Congress to pass a new law stating that there must be at least three individuals in any car traveling in the left lane on the Interstates.  Congress will pass legislation offering tax credits for those purchasing insulation for their homes.  The President will then announce that he will ask Congress to increase CAFE standards to 30 mpg by the year 2040 and 32 mpg by the year 2050.  Republican leadership will let it be known that they cannot support such measures.  

The unrest in both these countries will  move to the oil fields and many of the oil wells will be destroyed and  oil prices will skyrocket to $250/barrel and gasoline prices going over $5.50 per gallon.  Congress will pass a new law in which "even" license plates can fill-up on Monday, Wednesday and Friday with "odd" license plates filling up Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday.  Gas Stations must remain closed on Sunday.  The President will address the American people asking us to use our heat and air conditioning sparingly. Schools will now commence in late October to avoid air conditioning costs of late summer and will close from December through February to avoid heating cost in the middle of the winter. The school day will start an hour later and end hour earlier to further save energy. 

By the middle of the summer, the hurricane season will be upon us.  The warmer ocean temperatures will give rise to more ferocious and devastating hurricanes.  The first Level 5 hurricane should hit the Gulf in the end of July wiping out 35% of the oil and gas production in the region.  A second Level 5 hurricane is expected to land in early August destroying another 25% of the regional oil driving oil prices to  $400 a barrel and gas prices hit $7.00 a gallon where gasoline can be found. The economy then will come to a standstill as fuel is too scarce and too expensive for our usual business practices.  

Congress will recess this Summer and the President will vacation on Martha's Vineyard..  The Republican leadership in the House will announce that it will propose new legislation in the fall prohibiting gays from the teaching profession and new legislation expanding prayer in the schools. It is very satisfying that after almost 40 years from our country's first energy crisis, we have attained an energy independence that will not allow  energy shortfalls worldwide to negatively impact the American way of life.

BLOCKBUSTER TRADE PENDING

As the NBA trading deadline approaches, we just learned of the a major trade that brought all-star Carmelo Anthony from the Denver Nuggets to the New York Knicks for four lesser players. The trade had immediate dividends as Carmelo scored 27 points in his debut leading the Knicks in rout of the Milwaukee Bucks.

Today their are murmurs of a much larger trade that will have worldwide implications.  There are unconfirmed rumors that Afghanistan is talking directly to Egypt about a straight-up swap of Hosni Mubarak for Hamid Karzi.  Of course, Hosni would have to be coaxed out of retirement, but the belief is that he would be very interested in running another totalitarian regime.  Of course, it might take a little while for Hosni to get the iron fist back in shape but experts feel that he should be able to dominate the new country by the middle of the season.  Friends and associates report that Hosni is regularly goose-stepping along the beach at his vacation home in Sharmelsheik in hopes of a possible return to the imperial palace again.  Egypt, on the other hand,  has been looking for a less dominant leader and one that is content sitting in the background planning domestic policy.

This trade has major implications for the United States.  The US has been funding the old Mubarak regime in Egypt for the bargain price of $2 billion a year and has gotten security and absolute stability from Egypt for the past 12 years.  Afghanistan has been requiring about $120 billion per year of US funding over the past few years.  The US believes that if Mubarak is able to quell the current unrest and bring stability back to Afghanistan for the paltry sum of $2 billion per year then it will have an additional $118 billion per year under the salary cap.  This $118 billion could then be used to back new dictators, enhance our nation building efforts throughout the Third World and there could possibly be a billion left over to fund the heating assistance program for the impoverished ederly.

The key component of the deal sending Hosni Mubarak to Afghanistan is that it guarantees the Afghan people true democracy in about 30 years which is obviously much faster than anything that might be accomplished under the present regime.  There are several recent rumors that Libya is shopping Qaddafi.

President's Speech

The President's Speech - David Chappelle & Geoffrey Rush

 President's Speech is a movie starring Geoffrey Rush and Dave Chappelle in which Geoffrey Rush is hired by the President's staff to coach the President, played by Dave Chappelle, in strategies and methods of projecting more emotion and adding more tangible passion to his speeches to the American people.

Scene One: Oval Office of the White House

Mr Rush:  Okay Barack.

The President: Please call me Mr. President.

Mr. Rush: OK Barack..........You were informed that the House of Republicans just passed an alternative budget in which $60 billion is cut from programs that you strongly endorse.  Show some anger as you discuss developments with the American people.

The President:  My fellow Americans, last night I was chagrined to discover that the House of  Representatives passed an alternative budget to the one I recently presented to Congress. Their budget slashes many  of the programs that I strongly endorse and which I believe will help keep our Country on the course of recovery.  I can only hope they change their current positions......  You like how I worked in "hope and change"?

Mr. Rush - Mr President, with all due respect, I believe that you must generate a little more anger at the defiant Republican House.  For instance....Yesterday, the fucking, asshole Republicans in the House passed a fucking ridiculous budget that violates every fucking thing that I stand for.  Can you believe that these moronic and imbecilic Republicans are cutting the fucking education budget when education is the only fucking hope for the future?  These rich ass-kissing Republicans dare to cut the budgets for the SEC and the CFTC, the two agencies that oversee the fucking greedy bastards on Wall Street and all their fucking shenanigans and our only hope in preventing another calamitous crash of the markets.

Mr President: Ok, ok,ok ok........ I think I have it..........  My fellow Americans, there are no red states and no blue states, just the United States and last night the House of Representatives passed a budget which I believe does not support the goals and ambitions of all our people. Last month, I promised a new era of cooperation and civility so in that vein I will go back and look at the budget for the Department of Education and see where we can make significant cuts and I will look at the bloated budgets of the SEC and CFTC and work to streamline these agencies to make them conform to our new standards of efficient government.

Mr. Rush: Put on the coffree...it's going to be a long night.

Unbelieveable Double-Standard

For the past year or so, my wife and I have had trouble discussing the domestic political scene.  If you have followed my recent posts, you know that I have felt betrayed and disappointed by the policies of our current President.  I felt that the President never really elaborated his multiple year war plans for Afghanistan.  I felt betrayed when the public option was not even presented in Congress and I was horrified when the President capitulated in the fight to end the tax cuts for the richest Americans. 

Along the way, I have noticed a very strange phenomenon in which many of the President's female suporters remain loyal despite the failed promises and disappointments.  I have watched over the year as progressive pundits have fallen off the wagon. Keith Obermann, who helped establish any free clinics around the country, bailed on the President during the healthcare debate.  Ed Schultz expressed his disappointment with the President with his lack of support for the labor movement.  The other progressive talk show hosts all bailed on the President in December with the extension of the tax cuts for the wealthy.  However, there was still Randi Rhodes, normally as tough a "lefty" as they come defending the President's right to compromise.

Another female friend who fought long and hard against the war in Viet Nam stated during a discussion of the Afghan war that she thought that the war was "going as expected" which means that she was totally accepting on faith the President's evaluation of the progress in this war.  My wife, a die hard supporter of the President, stated publically in June 2010 that she would lose faith in the President if the "tax cuts for the wealthy" were extended.  We all know that the President had secret meetings with the other party while excluding his own party members to hammer these tax cut extensions.   Now instead of being angry, my wife talks about progress in bi-partisanship.  I know that if I had failed to deliver on my promises and if I had clandestine meetings with another party, I would be out the door in a second.  Why is the President given this blind allegiance?

Finally, another longtime female friend of left persuasion sent me this email in response to a recent blog,"  I guess I'm just not into beating on Obama, who I agree seems to be abandoning his liberal roots in a disconcerting way. However, it must be tough at the top, and he's obviously feeling the heat of compromise. The @#$@$% 2010 elections obviously didn't help. I just don't have the heart to get angry at him. I have to believe in someone!"   Honestly, the President could receive oral sex from a 21 year old intern and he would be defended with, "you have to understand the pressures of the job and the need for a release."

I know that this is not a statistically sound study, but my gut instincts tell me there is something to my observations.  That said, I will now announce the President is a shoo-in for 2012.  He has half the Democratic Party in the palm of his hand, add some minorities and top if off with  those centrists that he has bending over backwards to accommodate and you have a winning formula for 2012.

This Revolution Will Be Televised

I have been trying to stay abreast with that is going on in the Middle East, but I find it hard to remember and differentiate what is happening today in Bahrain versus what is happening in Libya.  Now with Yemen and Jordan thrown into the mix it is very hard not confuse and mesh these revolutions.

Therefore, I would like to suggest coverage that will help the average viewer keep the revolutions separate from one another.  This idea really comes from the historic way football had been covered on US television.  NBC always had the AFC.  On Sunday, when you turned on NBC you saw a AFC game.  CBS had the NFC and later gave up this coverage to Fox.  ABC would get the Sunday night game which usually was the key match-up of the weekend.

My proposed coverage becomes even more relevant as it looks like the NFL will not happen next year and the networks will be scrambling to fill hours of programming time.  First, NBC will get Yemen and Bahrain and Jordan if things heat up there.  Therefore, if you are interested in the events in one of these countries you go to NBC.  NBC has their ace, Richard Engel, who is ubiquitous and should be able to cover these three revolutions which are in relatively close proximity.

 CBS would get Libya which is big enough that it deserves its own network.  The CBS news team is not really as well staffed as the other networks and would do better with a single location.  Fox has asked to cover the events in  Wisconsin as it still has its TV crews in the area from the Super Bowl and boasts of its "fair and balanced" approach to covering domestic struggles between the left and the right.  Fox specializes in the multiple camera style so we can look forward to split screens with cameras in  the State House, on the streets and in the empty classrooms across the state.  That leaves ABC with coverage of Iraq and Afghanistan.  Since both these wars are winding down at a fast clip, we will also give ABC a program to be aired at 11:00PM, a la Ted Koppel, which will give a brief summary of all the events of the day.

The Super Bowl will be televised from Tehran.  Networks of course will have to bid for the rights for this coverage and the winning network will be announced as we get closer to this big event.

A Question for Michelle Obama.

In February 2008, Michelle Obama, at a rally ironically in Wisconsin, proudly boasted that "for the first time in her adult life, she was proud to be an American"  (see link below).   No doubt that sentiment was a response to the country's overwhelming support for a candidate who promised to bring about the long-awaited fundamental change to our political system.  The year 2008 seems like ancient history.

Well today I'd like to ask Michelle Obama a follow-up question:  "In the year 2011, are you still proud to be an American?"

Are you proud that the President capitulated to the Republicans' demand to extend tax cuts for the richest Americans wreaking further havoc on the out-of-control federal deficit?

Are you proud that the President's new budget inflates the $700 billion military budget by $22 billion while it simultaneously slashes $1 billion for financial assistance to seniors for their heating bills, and steals another $1 billion from food subsidies for impoverished children?

Are you proud that the President's budget protects and preserves $20 billion in farm subsidies and $6 billion in ethanol subsidies, even though most experts believe that these very inefficient forms of energy production only lead to higher food prices?

Will you continue to be proud of America if the Republicans are successful in muscling through many of the $61 billion ANTI-regulatory, ANTI-environment, ANTI-nutrition, ANTI-education, ANTI-economic development and PRO-business budget cuts they are currently proposing?

Can you continue to be proud of America if Congress is successful in repealing the new healthcare law?  Will you be proud if the EPA, FDA, Planned Parenthood and PBS/NPR crumble in the new year?  Can you state that you are proud of America if the "hope" and change we can believe in" vanish with the passing of the new federal budget.

I believe that we are now at a tipping point in America wherein the Republicans want to turn back the clocks 50 years.   We need to fight for the changes that we heard about in the 2008 campaign which should bring about a better tomorrow.  Will you be able to state in 2012 that "you are still proud to be an American"?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xa9GN1ul50c

Newspapers Make Comeback in Suburbs

I came home on one of those freezing cold days last week when the thermometer read 12 degrees although it felt many times colder due to the wind chill.  As I was thawing out, my wife mentioned that she had just purchased 13 weeks of the Philadelphia Sunday Inquirer.  I thought it a little unusual as we have not subscribed to a newspaper for many years as we get our news these days on the internet.  I have not missed those blackened hands that result from flipping through the Sunday news and I do not miss the piles of papers that accumulate waiting to be bound and taken out with the trash to be recycled.  I must admit that I do miss the flavor of the hometown Sunday sports section, but I did not believe that my wife could have been aware of those feelings.  I asked her, "What could have led you suddenly to subscribe to Sunday Inquirer?"  She informed that there was a young Africa-American man who knocked on our door in this freezing weather and was not even wearing a winter coat.  He explained that he was trying to put himself through college by selling subscriptions to the local paper.  My wife looked at me at confessed, "I just had to buy the paper from him."
The next Sunday I was walking my dog through our suburban neighborhood just after a light snow had fallen the previous night.  I smiled as I passed our recently delivered newspaper  on the curb of our driveway in its blue plastic bag.  As I walked, all of the sudden I noticed on this white blanket of snow throughout the neighborhood, a series of blue dots running up and down every street in the development. These blue bags were lying at the base of every driveway on every street.  I was amazed at the success of this clever marketing strategy aimed to take advantage of the suburban guilt complex.  I am not sure that this marketing plan will be successful in the long-term, but I can assure you that it has at least given the struggling newspaper industry a little breath of life.